A Long Way Home Read online

  “I can’t believe I didn’t see through him.” Hope said the words that had been riding her since her world had imploded. She’d never voiced them, only thought them, because she’d not confided in anyone until now.

  “Why would you? He sounds like he worked hard at getting you where he wanted you, all the while behind your back he was setting up another play.”

  “I should have realized.”

  “Shit happens to all of us sometime in life.”

  “Did it happen to you?”

  He was silent as they came out of the trail and headed back into town. He took her fingers in his and swung them a few times, and the surprise was, she let him. It felt strangely good to be connected to this man.

  “My dad.”

  Just two words, but they told her that there was a lot more that he was dealing with in relation to his father. Hope didn’t ask what. Something told her this was a touchy subject for Newman.

  “You should try being raised by my mom.”

  He snorted. “No, thanks. One demanding parent was enough.”

  “She was actually a good mom. I mean, we had everything and she made us independent, even though she comes across like this bitching hardass. I spent my childhood trying to get her approval,” Hope said softly. Now she’d started talking, it seemed she had a ton of stuff she wanted to say. As if years of silence had built up and needed release. “She was like this straight-A student, who excelled at everything.”

  “My father was the opposite, but I didn’t realize that until I was older. He always wanted me to do more, be more. I was never enough.”

  “I never knew that. I mean, I thought you were like the poster for the family to be.

  “Not so much.”

  And that had hurt him. Hope wondered if this had made him into the man he was today. The man who needed constant approval. The man who was always the first to help others.

  “Parents have a lot to answer for.”

  “True that,” he muttered as they reached the Hoot.

  Walking inside, they found Jake, Annabelle, and Brad seated at the table they’d left. Annabelle was looking at her photos.

  “Usually you ask permission to look at people’s stuff.”

  Hope’s words were waved away with an elegant flick of a wrist.

  “I’d heard you were good, Hope. Your mom’s always dropping little hints about your achievements, but I hadn’t seen any of your work before today. These are really good.”

  “Thanks.” It always gave her a little jolt when she heard Millicent had been praising her work.

  She took the seat Newman held out for her, then felt a hand on her shoulder.

  “You doing okay there, sweet cheeks?”

  “Sure, thanks, Buster.”

  He squeezed and then released her.

  “Now I suppose you want another one of those insipid teas.”

  “Just water thanks.” After her crying jag, she felt dehydrated.

  “So when’s the next assignment?” Annabelle asked. “Where are you flying off to next?”

  “Yes, and on that, we’ve all been walking around the fact that Wildlife are here but you’re not working with them,” Jake added. “So care to tell us why?”

  Hope looked at Newman, but his expression gave nothing away, and he remained silent, which told her he wasn’t going to say anything. The choice of full disclosure was hers. Could she lay open her life before these people like that? Do something she’d never done before, and actually ask for help?

  “I—ah, I kind of ran into trouble.” She said the words so quickly, they merged into one.

  “Yeah?” Brad joined the conversation. Like Newman, he’d been sitting in silence until then. “Who do we have to beat up for you?”

  Hope looked around the faces before her and realized that they were actually interested in what she had to say. She wouldn’t say she was close with any of them, but that didn’t matter because she was one of theirs. A Howler, therefore she mattered. It was a humbling thought, and an unsettling one.

  Hope had always believed herself an island. Isolated. It would take some effort to change that mindset.

  “Ha, thanks, but not necessary.”

  “Yet,” Newman added.

  “So someone does need a touch-up?” Jake said, suddenly serious.

  “Yeah.” Buster arrived again, and put a glass of water before her. “He needs a lesson taught to him all right.”

  “Okay, so spill, Hope. I don’t like that Buster knows something I don’t.” Annabelle looked determined.

  “The thing is, I really don’t think there’s anything that can be done, and I’m not entirely comfortable with all this.” Hope waved her hand around the table.

  “This being confiding?”

  Hope nodded in response to Annabelle’s words.

  “You’ll get used to it. My suggestion is just say it quickly. It’s less painful that way.”

  They all focused on her, and she noticed the side of Newman’s mouth lift. He knew she was cornered and would have to say something. She opened her mouth, but he stopped her.

  “No interruptions until she’s done.”

  “Who made you boss?” Annabelle glared at him.

  “Annabelle, you can’t be quiet for five seconds. I’m just asking that you at least try.”

  “Do you know this story already?”

  Newman nodded, and that had Annabelle’s lips tightening.

  “I don’t like him knowing stuff I don’t, so let’s hear it, Hope.”

  So she talked, and they listened. She even found herself mentioning the clips Jay had of her. Annabelle broke her vow of silence briefly to ask a question, Newman rolled his eyes, but after that, they let her finish.

  Jake whistled. “What a peach of a human.”

  “So how do we get him?” Annabelle said.

  “Tell them about your friend at Wildlife, Hope,” Newman said.

  She threw him a look, but his face was still calm. The man was turning her inside out. She’d never experienced what she had in his arms, with any man before him. She and Jay had had a pleasant thing, but it didn’t set her alight like Newman did. Just another reason she needed to get out of Howling.

  “A colleague from Wildlife called me to say she hadn’t believed Jay, but hadn’t said anything because she was scared of losing her job. She’s sort of a friend,” Hope added, and wasn’t entirely sure why. Maybe she wanted these people to know she had people in her life when she left here.

  “How do you have sort of a friend?” Jake asked.

  “Not everyone has lifelong buddies and lives like an episode of Friends like you weirdos,” Hope muttered.

  “Tough, you’ve always been one of us, you just never figured that out,” Annabelle said. “So we’re not ‘sort of’ buddies, we’re friends. Suck it up, buttercup, that’s just how it goes when you live in this town.”

  Hope refused to smile, but it was there. She felt warm on the inside that these people actually thought of her as a friend. Maybe not the really tight kind, but still, it was a nice feeling.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  “ Ok ay, so if this limp dick is all about the status and money, then that’s the angle,” Brad said.

  Newman watched as Hope’s eyes flicked between his friends as they talked. He couldn’t read her thoughts, but he sensed her excitement at the possibility that just maybe something could be done about what had happened to her.

  “I say we set up a fake scenario. A wealthy professor has come to Howling to do research on the wildlife here, he wants to employ a photographer, and needs him ASAP. But not just any photographer, this guy has to be the best, as there’s a grant in sight, and awards, accolades, etc.”

  Hope looked at him when he finished; looked but not really saw as he knew she was thinking about his words.

  “It would be hard to do something like that, because Wildlife pretty much know most people who are involved in conservation. Especially photographers, or anyone in the fil
m industry who made documentaries.”

  “Sure, but Ethan and I have a few contacts, so let’s just see what we can come up with. You got this douche bag’s e-mail and contact details, Hope?”

  She nodded.

  “Okay, so that’s good. We don’t have to actually make contact through Wildlife in that case. It can all just be through the limp dick.”

  “I just don’t think it’s right,” Hope blurted out. “I mean, I get what he did was wrong, but then two wrongs don’t make a right, and I’d be no better than him, surely?”

  Everyone looked at her like she had two heads. Buster was silently elected speaker.

  “Hope, Hope, wise up, sweetheart. The world is not a fair place, and if you want your job back we have to expose this piece of shit. Plus, you need to seriously think about going down the legal route. You have a strong case. Morals are all well and good, and have their place, so I’ve been told.” This made everyone but Hope laugh. “But unless you want to spend the rest of your life singing in seedy bars, and not well, or so I’m told, you need to do this to clear your name.”

  “I wasn’t that bad.” She glared at Newman.

  “No, you were.”

  “Okay, so maybe it’s time I actually went and spoke with my old boss. Maybe if I lay it all out, she’ll believe me.”

  “Will she?” Newman asked her.

  Her sigh was answer enough.

  “I don’t want it to be anything illegal.”

  “Sure, and as both Cubby and Katie wouldn’t be happy if we did that either, we’ll avoid it where we can,” Jake said.

  “So let’s think about this and then we’ll meet up. You want your mother on board, Hope?” Buster asked.

  “No. I haven’t told her yet.”

  “Understandable, but she’s smart and a lawyer, so maybe think about it.”

  The others left, leaving Newman and Hope alone at the table. He watched as she slowly packed away her things, and knew she was thinking hard about what had been discussed.

  “I just don’t know about this, Newman.”

  “Sure, got that, and if you still feel that way after we formulate a plan, no problem. But hear them out, Hope. Just listen to their ideas, is all I ask.”

  She nodded.

  “It’s weird.”

  “What’s weird?”

  “Them saying that stuff about friends, and wanting to help me.”

  She said it in an offhand tone, like it didn’t matter, but he wasn’t fooled. It mattered, and Newman knew that was because not many people had fought for Hope. Not many people had been in her corner. Her mother, he guessed, but in what capacity he had no idea. Her brother, definitely. Ryan had protected his baby sister. There had never been any doubts that the Lawrence siblings were close.

  “I’ll carry that for you.” He took her backpack after she’d loaded it.

  “I got it, thanks.”

  “Sure, but I have it now.”

  “Dammit, Newman!” She placed her hands on her hips and glared at him.

  “What?”

  “You know what. Now stop being a gentleman and give me my backpack.”

  “It’s ingrained, Hope, just roll with it,” came a voice from the kitchen.

  Hope stomped out of the Hoot with Newman on her heels.

  “Where to?” he asked.

  “I’m doing a shoot for Mac, so give me my laptop and I’ll go do it.”

  “I have some time free, want some help?”

  She half turned her body and gave him a look that would shrivel his balls, if he hadn’t been the recipient of just such a look from several of his lady friends before. She then gave up and stomped to the Roar. Newman followed, smiling.

  “This sweater is winter weight and itchy as hell, so have mercy and hurry the hell up!”

  Hope smiled behind her camera as Newman roared at her. He’d volunteered to help, so she’d decided he could model some of the clothes in the Roar. Mac, too, was wearing a sweater. Newman’s was gray, and Mac’s navy. They also wore beanies, gloves, and scarves.

  “I swear the sweat is rolling down my spine,” Newman said. “I’m broiling like a lobster.”

  “Nearly there.” She clicked a few more frames. “Done.”

  They stripped in record time, and she felt no remorse at their red cheeks.

  “Okay, I think we’ll put Newman in one of the chairs now, and he can pretend to read.”

  “I can read!”

  “Of course you can.”

  She and Newman walked to the rear of the shop. He grabbed her, dragging her behind a rack of scarves.

  “You’re enjoying this.”

  “A little,” Hope conceded, refusing to acknowledge how good it felt to have his hands on her. This had to stop.

  “Maybe I should heat you up a bit, so we’re equal.”

  Before she could stop him, he’d kissed her. Hard and fast, it robbed the breath from her body.

  “Don’t let me disturb you, I just want some of Annabelle’s soap. Maybe take it to the postcard aisle, I think that’s free.”

  The Texan drawl had Hope looking over her shoulder at Ethan Gelderman, aka Tex. The smile on his face was wide, and the twinkle in his eyes wicked.

  “Another model, just what I need,” Hope said, heading down the aisle. “Come and take a seat, Ethan.”

  “What?” The man followed along with Newman, who fell into the nearest seat, then crossed his ankles, looking suddenly relaxed and nothing like the predatory male who had just kissed her… twice in one day.

  “Just stay here for a sec,” Hope said. Seeing the Texan was holding a basket filled with honey and chocolate, she lifted her camera and snapped. “Smile now.” He did, and it packed a punch, but her stomach didn’t flutter like it did when Newman smiled.

  Big trouble, Hope . That man was a serial dater and woman specialist. He had women falling all over themselves to be with him, Ryan had told her. He’d caught up with Newman once, in LA, and the man had been dating some model at the time. He was way out of Hope’s league even if she was interested… which she wasn’t. No matter what he’d said, they were not ending up in bed. She wasn’t going to be just another name to add to his list of conquests.

  “What’s the frown for? Aren’t I doing it right?”

  “No, it’s great, really. I always frown,” Hope said.

  “Well now, honey, you’re pretty no matter what look you have on your face. But smiling’s good for the spirits.”

  “Lord save us from silver-tongued Texans,” Newman said.

  “Nothing wrong with being polite, pretty boy, and jealousy’s an ugly trait in anyone.”

  Hope got behind her camera as the men started to bicker, throwing insults back and forth with ease. She instructed Mac to pass them things, and still they argued. Hope realized this was their form of communication.

  “That woman speaks ten words a second, with gusts to fifty,” the Texan said as they discussed a local.

  “True that,” Newman said.

  She wrapped up thirty minutes later, sure she had enough to appease Mac. Hope then loaded the photos onto her laptop and left the boys to look them over. She needed to get her mother some of that lavender hand lotion that she liked, because she was just about out.

  “Your smile’s blinding me, Tex.”

  “All real, too, bud. Not a veneer in sight, like you.”

  Hope shook her head as the men continued to tease each other. All eyes turned as the door opened, but it was Hope who squeaked and dropped to her knees behind the homemade pickles.

  “One of you three know where I can locate some of that fudge?”

  “Well now,” Hope heard Newman say as she crawled along the aisle to the rear. There was a storeroom back there. If she could reach it, she’d be safe from Jay. “Which type of fudge would that be?”

  “You want me to say it slower?” Jay said in a rude tone that raised Hope’s hackles. How had she allowed this man to fool her so easily? “Because it seems to me like the
question wasn’t a difficult one.”

  “Well now.” This time it was the Texan speaking. He lengthened the “well” for a good two seconds, and his accent was so thick she could cut it with a knife. “We don’t get out of town much. Still, it has to be noted that we know what manners are.”

  Jay spluttered, and Hope, who was now hidden behind a large bookshelf, felt a smile tug at her lips.

  “Do you know who I am?” Jay demanded.

  There was a pause after that, and Hope held her breath so she could hear the next reply.

  “Some limp dick who thinks he’s something special, is my guess,” Newman said.

  “How dare you!”

  “No, you’re right,” Newman added. “I don’t know that you have a limp dick, but it just kind of goes with the territory when you’re an asshole, I’ve always found.”

  “True that,” Mac agreed.

  She stuffed the cuff of her shirt in her mouth to stop from giggling.

  “Who are you, anyways? Seems if we’re gonna insult you, we should be doing it by name,” Ethan said.

  “I’m Jay Herald. Head Wildlife photographer! How dare you speak to me in such a way. My crew have brought money into this pokey little hole you call home, and we can just as easily take it somewhere else!”

  “Not the Jay Herald?” Mac said.

  “Yes.” Jay’s voice softened now he thought they’d recognized him. Although why the hell he thought they would, she had no idea. The man was an egotistical idiot, and she could kick herself for not seeing that sooner.

  “Never heard of you,” Mac added.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  Newman looked at Jay Herald and battled the anger that was gripping him. He wasn’t a man who flew into rages, usually rational and calm. It was why he was good at his chosen profession. Right about now, however, he was ready to leap over the counter and pummel this asshole.

  Tall and wiry, he had the look women went for. Scruffy shoulder-length brown hair, a day’s growth on his face, and he wore his clothes effortlessly. Newman hated the fucker. Knowing he’d destroyed Hope’s career was enough reason, but that she’d had a thing with him was not helping.